January Devotions

Forgiving Slowly

I must admit, today’s devotional title—Forgiving Slowly—is not one I’ve often come across. After all, Paul’s instruction in Colossians 3:12–13 seems to point us in the opposite direction:

“So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offence. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.” (The Message)

But perhaps one word in Eugene Peterson’s paraphrase gives us a clue: completely.

To forgive completely often takes time. It suggests depth, honesty, and the kind of inner work that may not be instantaneous. A quick declaration of “I forgive you” can be easy; a wholehearted, healed, and restored forgiveness is often something more gradual — sometimes even costly.

Forgiveness, then, is not simply a moment but a journey. It moves at the pace of healing. It is a practice that asks patience of us — patience with our own wounded hearts, and sometimes patience with the slow process of rebuilding trust. Even when we choose to forgive, echoes of hurt may still arise. This doesn’t mean we have failed. It means we are human.

Forgiving slowly does not mean condoning harm; it means choosing to release the grip of resentment, step by step, so we ourselves may walk into freedom.

Imagine picking up a rope that has a tight knot in the middle. You can tug at it, yank it, or try to force it loose, but often the only result is a tighter, more tangled knot.

However, if you sit with it patiently — loosening one small part at a time, gently easing one loop free before working on the next — the knot eventually gives way.

Forgiveness works very much like that.

The first tug — the decision to forgive — is important. But the full unravelling of hurt takes time, gentleness, and repeated willingness. Slowly, patiently, God’s grace helps loosen the knots inside us until freedom begins to emerge.

Prayer

Gracious and patient God,

you know the knots that tighten within our hearts

and the hurts we struggle to release.

Teach us the grace of forgiving slowly —

with honesty, with courage,

and with a trust that you walk each step with us.

Help us to begin the work,

to loosen what binds us,

and to grow in the compassion and love

that Christ has shown to us.

May your Spirit heal what is wounded

and free us from all that keeps us bound.

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.